I wan born in a VERY WELL educated family where both of my parents are super high achievers. My Mom is a brain surgeon; my Dad had received numerous doctoral degrees in varied fields of science and has been working as a scientist for the past 40 years inventing new products to cure the incurables.

I am here today to promote his newest invention called the G.O.D. which stands for  GOOFY'S OSMOSIS DEVICE. With very limited supply, for those who are lucky enough to purchase his products today, you won't regret it for as long as you live!! Because just like and God, G.O.D. performs miracles. It will help store a new language instantly into your brain through something called the OSMOSIS  effect. And by definition, just in case you wonder, Osmosis simply stands for absorption.

You should hear the conversation between my dad and me when he first introduced the product to me, and what wonders it does, I was laughing out loud, -- Yah right, dad, that sounds like a joke! How are you going to expect anyone in the world to believe in you? It's just too good to be true! Dr. Bee replied solemnly, an action speaks louder than a thousand words, This magical device contains up to 5 language capacity you can choose from a worldwide language bank. Once you have your languages picked out, all you have to do is to peel off the FILM on the language card which contains about over 500gb of memory comparable to the most powerful personal computer made on earth-place it right on your forehead, and say "OSMOSIS" then let the magical device take control. No longer will you need a dictionary, a translation machine, a simultaneous interpreter or a language course of any kind! You will instantly speak in a native tongue.

I was stunt and got too curious, so I did as I was told - "OSMOSIS"  ( Babble in Mandarin )

Was that Mandarin that I was just speaking? Don't confuse me! But I never recall learning Chinese in my life! That's what we call Magic! Now try this!  "OSMOSIS"  ( again in French )

French sounds so romantic!

I think I an going to consider moving to France and dating a French man any day now!  YEAH ( with a victory hand gesture )

Well, dad, can I pick any language out of the blue ( looking at my hand gesture-the V signs ), say-something that begins with letter V for example? YOU BETCHA! So he pulled out LETTER V -that stands for Vietnamese "OSMOSIS" ( Speaking and singing in Vietnamese )

Vietnamese is just like a song in itself!

I did it again! Hmmm, let me see what's next? Ah, I have a brilliant idea! I am definitely going to go to Hong Kong this weekend. I will shop and bargain like a Cantonese and won't let anybody insult me again this time!!! Then, you should try this!  " OSMOSIS "  ( Speak in Cantonese )

and I ended up getting the most beautiful piece of jade at the jade market for a stunningly low price. Thanks to my GOD!

Are you convinced now, Ladies and gentlemen? GOD does perform miracles! If all these new languages work on an ordinary person like me, they'll certainly work on anyone of you in the audience! Besides, it's a lifetime guaranteed product. How muck does it cost? It won't cost you a fortune, I promised! But, be sure to pay in full, otherwise, I can't guarantee what foul language is going to come out of your mouth! In any event it does fail you? Don't feel frustrated! We do offer "after sales service!!" --I will definitely schedule an appointment for ypu to see my Mom - for a FREE BRAIN SURGERY!